Tuesday, May 28, 2013

Wood Goes Cock Grabbing

Frost (above) turned out to be Cameron the whole time.

Wood takes two from division foe as Frost reveals his identity

May 19th, 2013

Game 1: Wood 3 Gamecocks 2 (11 innings)
Game 2: Wood 8 Gamecocks 2

"Kevin can smell Jevon's pheromones from first to know when to steal..."
-Some kook wearing Kevin's jock strap over his head

"You can't have dogs here," Saul Milkypants informs Jevon pre-game
"Oh, ok I'll just tie him up there 7 feet away," Jevon responds.
"Well I uh- that doesn't really do it there bub," Milkypants responds visibly irritated

Game One

Millbrae, Ca - It wasn't enough for Frost that he sucker-punched Wood's power-hitting outfielder Zach Mandelblatt. Frost wanted more and Sunday's double-header against the rival Gamecocks was just the stage he needed. After missing the first seven games because he was "working" Cameron, I mean Frost showed up for pre-game warm ups donning his typical smile and wooden pipe as if nothing was wrong. Of course Cam deflected all questions surrounding the whereabouts of "Frost," but if the Hardy Boys and Nancy Drew were on the case, they'd solve the case before lunch and have plenty of time to make some bad decisions together...

What's that? Yes its called Eiffel tower.
Never heard of it? Here let me show
you Nancy

It seemed awfully convenient that Cam showed up for his first game to reclaim his spot in the outfield the very same week Mandelblatt was last seen face down on the basketball court with the wretched rap lyrics emanating around him. Coincidence? Not quite. Frost and Cam have never been seen in the same place at the same time. It's simple.

Frost is Cam, Cam is Frost! Finkle is Einhorn!

Since it was a long day and the blogger is clearly way behind in updates this week, we'll sum it up for you. Wood kicks ass and the other guys don't.

Game one went something like this: Chente Lopez delivers the 44th pitch...

Not the guy who asked Rocky to hit the bricks

And Chente delivers the 82nd pitch...And Chente delivers the 113th pitch...And Chente delivers the 712th pitch... and Wood wins. A brillant, brillant pitching performance and some timely offense led to a much needed Wood victory.

MVP of game 1: Chente Lopez who pitched his ass off and the guy who banned Rocky from the stadium prior to start of game one.

LVP of game 2: Cameron "Frost" Weisenesee who like his foe on the basketball court injured his back and shoulder doing warm-ups

Pat Whelly also tore up the base paths collecting three hits in the game. Will Tong also had two hits, one of which came after an 11-pitch at-bat.

Rocky posing for his best-selling book "Where's Rocky" hitting shelves in the states everywhere this fall. The book previously released in Slovakia, eclipsed its predecessor, "Where's Waldo" by 4 million copies.

This guy does not care for the new "Where's Rocky" books, but does own the most editions of
"where's vagina" released by Lesbian Weekly.com.

Oh yeah. Wood won the game 3-2 in 11 innings! Chente Lopez is still pitching nine days later otherwise he would've received the win in the game.

Still can't see him? Another million copies were just sold in the time you tried to look for him

Game Stats - 5/19/13 WOOD at Gamecocks

Box Score

WOOD (3) AT GAMECOCKS (2)

WOOD                 AB  R  H BI  GAMECOCKS            AB  R  H BI

Pat Whelly            5  2  3  1  Chris Ralston         4  1  3  0

Will Tong             4  0  2  0  Kevin Boucher         5  0  2  0

Alex Weber-Shapiro    5  0  1  0  James Boucher         5  0  1  0

Ryan Tovani           3  0  0  0  Mike Reisfelt         4  0  1  1

 Cam Weisensee        2  0  0  1  Greg Crimele          4  0  0  0

Grant Bledsoe         5  0  0  0  Pete Watts            5  0  1  0

David Aubuchon        4  0  1  0  Patrick Cunningham    5  0  1  0

Kevin Page            4  0  2  0  Ryan Oliver           4  0  2  0

Jevon Matiassi        2  0  1  0  Scott Martin          4  0  0  0

 Rick Roitinger       2  0  1  0  Gabe Candelria        3  1  0  0

Adam Fong             4  1  1  0

Frank Bauch           2  0  0  0

TOTALS               42  3 12  2  TOTALS               43  2 11  1

WOOD                          000 000 020 01 -- 3

GAMECOCKS                     001 010 000 00 -- 2

LOB--WOOD 7, GAMECOCKS 12. ERR--James Boucher. 2B--Adam

Fong, Pete Watts, Ryan Oliver. HBP--Will Tong. SB--Pat

Whelly (4), Kevin Page.

 WOOD                            IP    H    R   ER   BB   SO   HR

Chente Lopez                  11.00   11    2    1    4    8    0

 GAMECOCKS

Kevin Boucher                 11.00   12    3    3    0    5    0

PB--Jevon Matiassi. SO--Frank Bauch, Cam Weisensee, Alex

Weber-Shapiro, Ryan Tovani (2), Pete Watts, Scott Martin,

Kevin Boucher, Patrick Cunningham (2), Mike Reisfelt, Gabe

Candelria (2). BB--Greg Crimele, Chris Ralston, Mike

Reisfelt, Gabe Candelria.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The fans were out in full force for
game two. Newly engaged Anna Lee
led the charge

Game Two

"Oh Mr. McDevitt, I thought you were starting today..."
"I did..."
"Oh."
-Janitor cleaning the dugout with two outs in the first inning

"There's a fine line between gay chicken and a hand job... say uncle... say uncle!"
-Ryan and Jevon playing a game of gay chicken in the dugout

And Chente delivers the 231st pitch...

How do you mix up fisting and indian burns? Darn
you Dancing with Penises how would you like an indian
burn in the rectum? You wouldn't now would you?

Game two started with Steve McDevitt on the mound and ended shortly after he accidentally gave himself and indian burn while actually trying to fist himself. Luckily Kevin "I have a special" Pager code for when Frost calls relieved the brittle veteran and pitched six dazzling innings as Wood cruised to victory in the nightcap.

Wood cruised to the easy 8-2 victory riding on the strong pitching by Page and the bats of Alex Weber-Shapiro, Rick Roitinger, Steve McDevitt and Ryan Tovani all of who had multiple hits in the game.

Shortly after the game Roitinger was picked up by SF
zoo officials and return to his natural habitant in
the primate exhibit

MVP of the game goes to Rick Roitinger who erected probably what saved nine Wood players from heat storke.

Wood squares off versus the Bay Sox next week at San Leandro. Great seats are still available.

Game Stats - 5/19/13 Gamecocks at WOOD

Box Score

GAMECOCKS (2) AT WOOD (8)

GAMECOCKS            AB  R  H BI  WOOD                 AB  R  H BI

Chris Ralston         2  0  0  0  Pat Whelly            4  1  1  1

Kevin Boucher         4  1  2  0  Will Tong             4  1  0  0

James Boucher         4  0  0  0  Alex Weber-Shapiro    4  2  3  1

Mike Reisfelt         3  1  3  0  Ryan Tovani           3  2  2  1

Greg Crimele          4  0  0  1  Kevin Page            3  0  0  0

Pete Watts            2  0  1  0   David Aubuchon       0  0  0  0

Ryan Oliver           3  0  0  0  Jevon Matiassi        2  0  0  0

Mike Vance            4  0  0  0   Grant Bledsoe        1  0  0  0

Ben Amudson           3  0  0  0  Frank Bauch           3  1  0  0

Scott Martin          3  0  0  0  Steve McDevitt        3  1  2  2

Jeremiah Fielder      2  0  0  0  Rick Roitinger        4  0  2  2

                                  Chente Lopez          2  0  0  0

TOTALS               34  2  6  1  TOTALS               33  8 10  7

GAMECOCKS                     000 000 002 -- 2

WOOD                          204 000 20x -- 8

LOB--GAMECOCKS 11, WOOD 8. ERR--Pat Whelly, Alex

Weber-Shapiro, Rick Roitinger. 2B--Pat Whelly, Rick

Roitinger. HBP--Ryan Oliver, Will Tong. SB--James Boucher,

Alex Weber-Shapiro, Ryan Tovani.

 GAMECOCKS                       IP    H    R   ER   BB   SO   HR

Scott Martin                   8.00   10    8    7    6    3    0

 WOOD

Steve McDevitt                 2.00    3    0    0    1    1    0

Kevin Page                     6.00    1    0    0    4    7    0

Grant Bledsoe                  1.00    2    2    1    0    1    0

SO--Greg Crimele, Scott Martin (2), Ryan Oliver, Mike Vance

(3), Ben Amudson, Jeremiah Fielder, Frank Bauch (2), Grant

Bledsoe. BB--Pete Watts (2), Chris Ralston (2), Mike

Reisfelt, Pat Whelly, Frank Bauch, David Aubuchon, Steve

McDevitt, Jevon Matiassi, Ryan Tovani.

Saturday, May 18, 2013

The Great White Tope

First he won't wear the nipple clamps and now a
7-3 drubbing from the Topes? I'm taking my cans
and looking for a real man.

Isotopes Take Another Game from Wood, Jevon's Girlfriend Departs in Disgust

May 11th, 2013

ISOTOPES 7
Wood 3

"Good lord, this thing looks like a toasted marshmallow..."
-Jevon Mattiassi the morning after having sex with the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man's sister

"Jevon you no have time to bone no more."
-Jevon's girlfriend the can lady

"That Weber-Shapiro is one fine piece of a, if you know what I mean...I love watching him make diving catches..."
-Every female in San Francisco county

San Francisco, Ca - Every great leader throughout history, whether it was Roman Marcus Auerlius fighting in the north, General Patton fighting the Germans, or Lance Bass leading his group in a groovy acapella tune, always had a pre-battle drink to get the endorphins revved.

In today's sporting world it's not a whole lot different. Most great athletes choose something hydrating; whatever will help them on the field or court. Gatorade is a good one. Water. Perhaps even a pre-game Pepsi to get some caffeine pumping through their veins would do the trick.

I am Marcus Aurilieas commander of the northern
legion - oh wait a second, i almost forgot. Commodus, pass
me that quart of Lucerne milk over there real quick

Milk was a bad choice

For Wood standout Matt Moyer the concept is the same, but the execution is clearly way off and on May 11th, we witnessed our first athlete consuming copious amounts of dairy pre-first pitch.

Unlike Moyer's tender battle with his milk bottle, the play on the field was a fierce strategic militant effort on both sides. Kevin "When i was little I used to wear makeup and compete in beauty" Pageants took the hill and was nothing short of brilliant. He mowed through Tope hitters like former basketball star Jason Williams at a chauffeur convention. He held the revered Topes scoreless through three innings which had previously only been done by Nolan Ryan, Cy Young and Jack Kevorkian.

Wood's offense was overall slow to the show but struck first in the top of the first inning when Zach Mandelblatt singled in Matt Moyer, but that would be all the offense until the 5th inning when Wood would tack on one more run.

The 5th inning wasn't as kind to Wood as the Topes chalked up three runs to take a 4-1 lead and never looked back. Steve McDevitt and Zach Mandelblatt closed out the game on the mound for Wood, but the lead ultimately was insurmountable and the Topes took home the victory.

His old scoutmaster had given Weber-Shapiro that bat

The most devastating part of the game came in the 4th inning when Wood went through $300 bats, one of which included Weber-Shapiro's infamous toasted marshmallow bat.

At the plate Mandelblatt, and Weber-Shapiro each had multi-hit games and Pat Whelly, and Matt Moyer also added hits, but after the 4th spot in the lineup offense was pretty much nil.

This small town in Portugal was elated to see Weber-Shapiro
enter the city limits and catch the fly ball

Player of the game award goes to Weber-Shapiro who had to run halfway around the world to catch a blast off the bat of the Topes cleanup hitter.

Wood squares off against division leader Gamecocks this Sunday for a double-header. Great seats are still available.

Game Stats - 4/7/13 WOOD at Isotopes

Box Score

WOOD (3) AT ISOTOPES (7)

WOOD                 AB  R  H BI  ISOTOPES             AB  R  H BI

Pat Whelly            5  0  1  0  Christopher Viegas    4  1  0  0

Matt Moyer            5  1  1  1  Brandon Barron        3  1  0  0

Alex Weber-Shapiro    5  1  2  0  Sean Scott            4  1  2  2

Zach Mandelblatt      4  0  2  2  Daniel Rogers         4  0  0  1

Will Tong             4  0  0  0  Alexander Robins      3  1  2  1

Grant Bledsoe         4  0  0  0  Leo Ortiz             4  1  2  0

Ryan Tovani           3  0  0  0  Brian Brooks          3  1  0  0

Jevon Matiassi        4  0  0  0  Jackson Tavo Hall     4  0  2  3

Frank Bauch           2  0  0  0  Edgar Murillo         3  1  0  0

 Kevin Page           0  1  0  0

TOTALS               36  3  6  3  TOTALS               32  7  8  7

WOOD                          100 001 100 -- 3

ISOTOPES                      000 130 03x -- 7

LOB--WOOD 9, ISOTOPES 5. 2B--Alex Weber-Shapiro, Jackson

Tavo Hall. HBP--Edgar Murillo. SB--Zach Mandelblatt, Sean

Scott, Alexander Robins.

 WOOD                            IP    H    R   ER   BB   SO   HR

Kevin Page                     5.00    5    4    4    2    6    0

Steve McDevitt                 2.00    0    0    0    0    2    0

Zach Mandelblatt               1.00    3    3    3    1    1    0

 ISOTOPES

PB--Jevon Matiassi. SO--Frank Bauch, Alex Weber-Shapiro,

Grant Bledsoe (2), Jevon Matiassi (2), Will Tong (2), Ryan

Tovani (2), Daniel Rogers, Sean Scott, Brian Brooks,

Christopher Viegas (3), Brandon Barron (2), Jackson Tavo

Hall. BB--Kevin Page (2), Ryan Tovani, Brian Brooks,

Alexander Robins, Brandon Barron.

Saturday, May 11, 2013

Mad Dogs Do Bite

The only dog on the field that wasn't mad looks on

Classic Tale of Man Bites Dog; dog drills Moyer in the tricep
Wood lets the dog out in winning fashion

May 5th, 2013

WOOD 13
Mad Dogs 5

"It's hard to swing with this boner..."
-Matt Moyer trying to bat with Rick's chest hair exposed leading off second base

"Ah, yes sir, I will file this away. I'll also have a fresh pair baseball slacks like you requested sir, shall we say by start of 5th inning?"
-Steve McDevitt after being handed Jevon's dip to put away for him

"It's hard to watch with this boner..."
-Strange Kook sticking his genitalia through the fence wire

Albany, Ca - Throughout the history of time, every man young or old, dapper or ugly, straight or gay, gentleman or asshole has had a wing man. First there was Jesus with Peter. Sherlock had Holmes, Batman had Robin. and George Michael had his glory hole. Last Sunday when Mad Dog reliever Paulie Pussynickle unleashed the fury of a 90mph fastball (his fastest pitch of the game by about 30mph) into the sinewy muscle fibers of Matt Moyer's tricep a new tandem was formed. Michael Jordan had Pippen, Magic had Kareem, and on this day Mandelblatt had Moyer.

Finally Zach found the wingman he'd always dreamed of
Zach took this picture of Matt during this week's trip to Monterey
in between picking up chicks at the acquarium together

Pussynickle just before his
"Dick of the Year" award was announced

With Wood up by 8runs in the 8th inning, Mandelblatt bolted for second stealing the bag easily. Pussynickle didn't take kindly to the flippant gesture and proceeded to drill Moyer in the arm on the next pitch, instantly etching in history the wingmanship between the two Wood.

"I knew that was coming, I should've bobbed instead of weaved up there," Moyer commented post-game, as his ulna was protruding from his spleen.

Coincidentally, being that it was Cinco de Mayo, Wood's lone Latin member not only managed the team, but also started on the mound. He also batted in all nine slots in the starting lineup. How do you like like Treaty of Guadalupe Hiladalgo?

Who's up now? Wait, Chente again? Seriously?

Lucky for Wood, their token Latin player also happens to be one helluva pitcher and he cruised through the first four innings of work unscathed, locked in a pitchers duel.

The first four innings came and went faster than Jevon at a seventies porno themed wank booth, before Wood finally got on the board in the fourth. The big hit however came off the bat of Pat Whelly who drove in three with his smash in the 5th inning.

Jev you still owe me the full $100

This glove's got to be at least 2
times this big

The Mad Dogs battled back however, and after the excitement of Whelly's big hit died down, Wood looked up to find themselves in a dogfight (see what I just did there?) with the score tied after five. Luckily that tie lasted only momentarily as Wood battled back for four more runs in the top half of the next inning. Matt Moyer and Grant Bledsoe led off the inning with free passes (not the ones that involve glow sticks and club rubber), Jevon Mattiassi reached on an error and that opened up the door for Kevin "youngdirtysluts.com is my home" Page who laced a single to get the RBI-party started. Alex Weber-Shapiro and Will Tong also had RBI hits in the inning. From there the hits kept coming with another four in the 7th and another in the 8th.

Steve McDevitt took the torch from Lopez and pitched the 7th and the 8th. He allowed one run but with the "Kids Who Can't Dive Good," defense behind him, it was a miracle he didn't give up more than two triples in an inning.

Mandelblatt shut the door in the ninth to collect another save thingy or whatever they call it when you're up by 8.

I dare you to pick me off Pussynickle

The most sensual point in the game was in the 8th when Rick "How you doing, I'm the Hoff" Roitinger led off of second base full chest exposed. Sixteen GILFS in the stands went beserk and beiseiged the infield just for a chance to touch the sultry beast. Unfortunately he was picked off before they could reach the basepaths. (Ok so he wasn't but the story is more believable if I add this)

Player of the game: Matt Moyer for his excellent wingmanship, and ability to hit with a boner.

It should also be noted that Weber-Shapiro made another spectacular grab in the outfield. The only reason it is this far down in the blog is because he does it ever week.

Wood squares off against the Topes next Saturday. Great seats are still available.

Game Stats - 5/5/13 WOOD atMad Dogs

Box Score

WOOD (13) AT MAD DOGS (4)

WOOD                 AB  R  H BI  MAD DOGS             AB  R  H BI

Alex Weber-Shapiro    5  1  2  1  Jared Van Der Beek    3  1  1  0

Adam Fong             2  1  0  0  Nick Saraceni         4  1  1  3

 Will Tong            2  0  1  1  Jason Moore           4  0  1  1

Pat Whelly            4  2  2  2  Omar Ramos            4  0  0  0

Zach Mandelblatt      5  0  1  1  Jimmy Bennet          4  0  1  0

Matt Moyer            2  1  1  1  Mike Deeble           3  0  0  0

Grant Bledsoe         4  2  1  0  Jeremy Lebeau         1  0  0  0

Jevon Matiassi        5  2  0  1   Ross Pomerantz       2  1  0  0

Kevin Page            5  3  2  2  Zachary Braband       4  0  1  0

Ryan Tovani           5  1  2  2  Jeff Pollock          4  1  1  0

Rick Roitinger        2  0  2  1

Frank Bauch           2  0  0  0

TOTALS               43 13 14 12  TOTALS               33  4  6  4

WOOD                          000 134 410 -- 13

MAD DOGS                      000 040 000 -- 4

LOB--WOOD 9, MAD DOGS 5. ERR--Grant Bledsoe. 2B--Ryan

Tovani, Rick Roitinger, Nick Saraceni, Jason Moore. 3B--Ryan

Tovani. HBP--Matt Moyer, Jared Van Der Beek. SB--Pat Whelly,

Kevin Page, Grant Bledsoe, Zach Mandelblatt, Jared Van Der

Beek.

 WOOD                            IP    H    R   ER   BB   SO   HR

Chente Lopez (W)               6.00    4    4    4    2    1    0

Steve McDevitt                 2.00    2    0    0    0    5    0

Zach Mandelblatt               1.00    0    0    0    0    0    0

 MAD DOGS

Ross Pomerantz                 6.00    6    8    4    4    5    0

Ben Graber                     3.00    8    5    5    1    1    0

WP--Ross Pomerantz (3). SO--Frank Bauch, Kevin Page, Grant

Bledsoe, Jevon Matiassi, Zach Mandelblatt, Adam Fong, Jeremy

Lebeau, Omar Ramos, Jimmy Bennet, Nick Saraceni, Mike

Deeble, Jason Moore. BB--Pat Whelly, Grant Bledsoe, Matt

Moyer (2), Adam Fong, Mike Deeble, Ross Pomerantz.

LOCATION: Albany

WEATHER: Foggy

How do you like that Rocky?

Saturday, May 4, 2013

Wood Diffuses Red Giants

Wood sweeps double header as Fuhrer returns

Roitinger's latest victim, "yep he's circumcised,"
a satisfied Roitinger announced after leaving
Leopold's dorm room that fall morning

April 27th, 2013

Game 1
Wood 20
Red Giants 0 (5 innings)

Game 2
Wood 9
Red Giants 2

Rick: "Zach, you're uncircumcised right?"
Zach: "I uh-wha?"
Rick: "I'll find out"

Game One
San Mateo, Ca - According to 17 expert scientists polled, or Wikipedia, one of the two, Red giants are stars that have exhausted the supply of hydrogen in their cores. They have radii tens to hundreds of times larger than that of the sun. However, their outer envelope is lower in temperature, giving them a reddish-orange hue. On this day, there were no stars or reddish hues, however there was a hungover Zach Mandelblatt. His hue resembled that of the resulting offspring if Casper the Ghost and a pantomime were to reproduce.

So... you want to get out of here or something? You had me at boo.

Below is a sequence of Mandelblatt's previous evening:

Mandelblatt enjoying a couple of cold ones
at Friday happy hour

Mandelblatt does
an innocuous cannonball

Well now, this just went from 0to60

Scratch that - 0to100

Not Mandelblatt, not sure how this got in here

Now the night's getting started

Mandelblatt doing his best glow stick/pantomime trick
(Apparently this is all the rage with kids these days)

Mandelblatt - 4am Club Rubber bathroom

Mandelblatt (center) huddled in a warm clothing in
75 degree heat next day

QUOTE OF THE DAY:
"Your change up is great, you got me on it"
-Matt Moyer attempting to compliment opposing pitcher

"I don't have a change up"
-pissed off opposing pitcher

And now to the game.

Alright Lewis, once we discover that last plot of land,
say lets call it Oregon, we'll head back to the homeland.
Hopefully it will be the 3rd inning by then

Kevin "Dude you should check out my Facebook" Page took the mound in the first game and tossed five shut-out innings in the win. The biggest perk for Page was the ability to get some much needed errands done in between innings. Sure, Page is an expert when it comes to time management with laundry, renewing his license at the DMV, and picking up dry cleaning, but as Jevon says, "Let's be honest here for a second..." Lewis and Clark could've trail-blazed the entire United States and returned home in between innings.

Wood put up three runs in the first, seven in the second, and another five in third and fourth innings. When the smoke settled and the Fuhrer, Brandon "My favorite geometry shape is a hexagon because it has six" Sides was able to digest the carnage the score was 20-0.

Sides wasted no time implementing his rule back into the fray once Wood was up.

"Alright guys, no more running, we're up 19-0," Sides made everyone aware.

And the next pitch... Mattiassi steals second.

"Ok, no more running, now," Sides reiterates.

And... Moyer steals home, 20-0.

"Ok, how about now..." a dejected Sides mutters.

"Who missed the extra point?"
-Some dick Wood player

Highlights of game one included multi-hit games from Will Tong, Grant Bledsoe, Jevon Mattiassi, and Matt Moyer, a 3-run bomb off the bat of Mandelblatt which dented a 500 year-old tree, and a new hypothesis that Moyer and belts just aren't working out.

"It's not you it's me," Moyer whispered to his wicker belt.

Once Moyer was seen here at the local mall everyone concluded that
the missing belt wasn't Moyer's problem, it was Moyer himself who clearly
is still figuring out this whole keep the pants up thing

Bonehead of the week award goes to Frank Bauch for "jinxing" Kevin Page's no-hitter in inning #2.

Additional highlights for those stat geeks out there:
Mattiassi, Whelly, Weber-Shapiro and Moyer all touched home 3 times
Mandelblatt had 4 RBI's
Grant Bledsoe had 2 runs, 2 hits, and 2 RBI's, and 2 reach arounds
Page struck out 4 and allowed just 1 hit in getting the win.
The Red Giants had 16 at-bats. Total.

"Are those soccer babes still out?"
-Rick Roitinger observing the Hillsdale Middle school soccer tryouts, while also registering himself on MegansLaw.com

Dave:"Hey Pat do you think Kevin will throw a no-hitter?"
Kevin: "Uh guys I'm right here - I can hear you"

Game Stats - 4/27/13 Red Giants at WOOD

Box Score

WOOD (20) AT RED GIANTS (0)

WOOD                 AB  R  H BI  RED GIANTS           AB  R  H BI

Pat Whelly            2  3  1  1  Brendan Chan          1  0  0  0

 Frank Bauch          2  0  0  0  Joseph Magdelano      1  0  0  0

Matt Moyer            5  3  2  1  Chris Powell          2  0  0  0

Alex Weber-Shapiro    3  3  1  1  Matt Palley           2  0  0  0

Zach Mandelblatt      2  2  1  4  Ben Ferreira          2  0  1  0

 Rick Roitinger       1  1  0  0  Casey Riegler         1  0  0  0

Ryan Tovani           2  2  0  2  Corey Chidester       2  0  0  0

Jevon Matiassi        3  3  2  2  Ceelo White           2  0  0  0

Grant Bledsoe         3  2  2  2  JR Munini             1  0  0  0

David Aubuchon        3  0  0  2  Adair Chaballa        1  0  0  0

Will Tong             3  1  2  3  Bill Ferreira         1  0  0  0

Steve McDevitt        1  0  0  1

Brandon Sides         2  0  0  0

TOTALS               32 20 11 19  TOTALS               16  0  1  0

WOOD                          375 500 -- 20

RED GIANTS                    000 00x -- 0

LOB--WOOD 9, RED GIANTS 4. ERR--Matt Moyer, Matt Palley, JR

Munini, Joseph Magdelano, Chris Powell, Casey Riegler.

2B--Pat Whelly. HR--Zach Mandelblatt. HBP--Steve McDevitt.

SB--Pat Whelly, Jevon Matiassi, Matt Moyer, Zach

Mandelblatt, Will Tong.

 WOOD                            IP    H    R   ER   BB   SO   HR

Kevin Page                     5.00    1    0    0    3    4    0

 RED GIANTS

Joseph Magdelano               2.00    7   10    7    3    2    1

Casey Riegler                  3.00    4   10    2    8    2    0

WP--Casey Riegler (3). SO--David Aubuchon, Brandon Sides

(2), Ryan Tovani, JR Munini, Bill Ferreira, Chris Powell,

Ceelo White. BB--Pat Whelly, Alex Weber-Shapiro (2), David

Aubuchon, Grant Bledsoe, Steve McDevitt, Jevon Matiassi,

Will Tong, Ryan Tovani (2), Rick Roitinger, Joseph

Magdelano, Brendan Chan, Casey Riegler.

Game Two
Game two started just as every game should've the past seven seasons; with Sides singing some of his favorite showtunes, and Wood in a positive mood after the morning's shellacking.

Sides lets it all out in game two

Steve McDevitt took the mound in the nightcap and went 6 innings, giving up one run, striking out 10 and walking nil, but we can't give him too much credit; had a one-legged donkey fresh out of Tijuana took the mound he would've also managed a great stat line, but mostly because of the similarity in penis size 1 Despite the offensive explosion in game one, Wood bats still struck for two in the first, one in the fourth and three in the 6th allowing McDevitt to depart with a 6-1 lead. He handed things off to Sides who pitched two stellar innings in relief.

1 - "Your son has a huge penis" Jevon Mattiassi to Steve's Dad, July 2011

Sides awaits for Tovani to escort him back to his bench spot after setting down the Red Giants in the 8th

"I can play short"
-Kevin Page prior to making a plethora of errors at shortstop

Chente Lopez came in fresh from a two hour drive to mop up the 9th.

The offense in game two was a well-balanced attack, but one thing that didn't contribute to the onslaught was Dave Aubuchon's "soft line drive" (as scored in iScore) off the fence in left field. Bledsoe, Moyer, McDevitt, Whelly, Weber-Shapiro, Page, Roitinger, Mattiassi, and Aubuchon all had hits in the win.

Tovani doing his little shimee, makes the Wood women go crazy

Wood will take their next quest to Albany High to take on the Mad Dogs Sunday. Great seats are still available.

Game Stats - 4/27/13 WOOD at Red Giants

Box Score

RED GIANTS (2) AT WOOD (9)

RED GIANTS           AB  R  H BI  WOOD                 AB  R  H BI

Brendan Chan          4  0  0  0  Matt Moyer            1  1  1  0

Joseph Magdelano      4  0  0  0   Will Tong            1  0  1  0

Chris Powell          4  1  3  0   Steve McDevitt       1  1  1  1

Matt Palley           3  0  0  0  Pat Whelly            4  0  1  1

 Geary Earnest        1  0  0  0  Alex Weber-Shapiro    4  1  1  0

JR Munini             3  0  1  0  Zach Mandelblatt      2  0  0  0

Corey Chidester       3  0  2  1  Ryan Tovani           3  0  0  1

Duane Harris          3  1  1  0  Kevin Page            4  1  1  0

Adair Chaballa        2  0  1  1  Frank Bauch           3  1  0  0

 Ben Ferreira         0  0  0  0  Rick Roitinger        2  0  1  1

Ryan Aguilar          3  0  0  0   David Aubuchon       2  2  2  1

Chris McGuirk         3  0  0  0  Jevon Matiassi        3  1  1  1

Casey Riegler         3  0  0  0  Grant Bledsoe         3  0  1  0

                                   Chente Lopez         0  1  0  0

                                  Brandon Sides         1  0  0  0

TOTALS               36  2  8  2  TOTALS               34  9 11  6

RED GIANTS                    000 010 100 -- 2

WOOD                          200 103 03x -- 9

LOB--RED GIANTS 8, WOOD 11. ERR--Ben Ferreira, Alex

Weber-Shapiro, Kevin Page, Will Tong, Ryan Tovani. 2B--Kevin

Page, David Aubuchon, Grant Bledsoe, Jevon Matiassi, Rick

Roitinger. 3B--Will Tong. SB--Ben Ferreira, Chris Powell,

Alex Weber-Shapiro, Jevon Matiassi (2), Matt Moyer, Zach

Mandelblatt (2), Will Tong, Ryan Tovani.

 RED GIANTS                      IP    H    R   ER   BB   SO   HR

Ryan Aguilar                   0.33    0    0    0    0    0    0

Ben Ferreira                   4.00    8    6    3    4    1    0

 WOOD

Steve McDevitt                 6.00    5    1    1    0   10    0

Brandon Sides                  2.00    2    1    0    1    2    0

Chente Lopez                   1.00    1    0    0    0    1    0

PB--Ryan Tovani. WP--Ben Ferreira. SO--Matt Palley, Duane

Harris, Chris McGuirk (2), Ryan Aguilar (3), JR Munini,

Joseph Magdelano, Brendan Chan, Chris Powell, Casey Riegler,

Corey Chidester, Frank Bauch, Zach Mandelblatt. BB--Ben

Ferreira, Pat Whelly, Frank Bauch, Alex Weber-Shapiro, Jevon

Matiassi, Zach Mandelblatt (2), Will Tong (2), Chente Lopez,

Ryan Tovani.